As Christmas approaches, my excitement typically rises. It’s my favorite time of year. But without fail, someone will utter the words “better be good, so Santa brings you lots of presents.” Or “you are such a sweet girl, I bet Santa will bring you something nice this year.”
My kids have always looked at me or my husband confused. I smile, and we changed the subject. They mean well. I get that. But we do things a little differently in my house.
Last night, for the first time, my 6 year old looked at me and said “I do not think Emmy is on the nice list this year.” I am thankful her little sister didn’t hear her say that. I honestly was taken back. Ugh. Now how do I get this out of her head?
I don’t do elf on the shelf. I personally find him a little creepy. This could have something to do with growing up in the Chuckie era, but a little elf, mischievously moving around my house, spying on my kids, nope not for me.
Absolutely no judgement to those that do it. I know a lot of parents that do. They have a ton of fun with it. Their ideas are super creative and their kids enjoy it. I enjoy seeing their pictures. I just don't do it. Recently, Elly told me that her friend has an elf at home. My response: “that’s nice.”
Other than the creepy factor, is the fact that we don’t use Santa as a threat or a punishment. We never have.
Honestly, Santa is a hot debate between me and my husband. And, yes, I have read many Christian articles that support Santa and many that are extremely against Santa. My husband feels like Santa is one big, giant lie and we are causing our kids future trauma.
First, Santa isn’t always watching them. I remember hearing a child equate Santa watching them to how God watches them. “Santa can always see what I am doing, just like God.” I don’t want my kids to elevate Santa to that level. If your child has some confusion, I have seen some “Santa cams” which might be a good alternative to all the all knowing and seeing Santa Clause.
We also don’t threaten to lose gifts. Christmas already has too much focus on gifts for the wrong reasons. And frankly, what my kids get for Christmas doesn’t reflect their behavior. No one is going to lose gifts for inappropriate behavior. It would be an empty threat here. I also don’t want them behaving only for gifts.
That goes against how we discipline in our home.
We visit Santa every year, well not this year. Due to covid, they haven’t even asked to go. They wrote letters instead. We always leave out delicious gluten free cookies for him. And of course, a carrot for the reindeer. We can’t leave out the reindeer.
When it comes to gifts, we do the small toy gifts from Santa. Santa brings each girl a few small items and fills their stocking with candy. Maybe a little less candy this year due to mommy working from home. But the big stuff is from us.
My reasoning for this, I am reminded of the child that isn’t getting much for Christmas, or maybe anything at all. It could be because one of their parents recently lost a job. Maybe there was a death in the family. Maybe their mom is working two jobs just to make ends meet. Those kids hear the stories of their friends getting an Xbox or an iPad from Santa and they wonder if they were not good enough. How good did they have to be to get presents?
When it comes to gifts, we are really trying to focus on giving more than receiving. Every year my kids donate many of their toys to other children. They pick out what they would like to give away. They are always more generous than I would expect.
This year my two oldest girls picked angels off the tree at church. They wanted to use their own allowance money they have saved to buy these gifts. They made sure they did their chores because they wanted to have enough money to spend on them. It was also important to them to pick out the items. They were so incredibly excited to drop their gifts off at church. Their joy in buying for others made my mommy heart happy.
We typically make 100’s of cookies and give them to family, friends and neighbors. This activity we will not be able to do this year in its normal fashion. (Stupid covid) But we did make some cookies as a family.
In the past, we have made a full Christmas dinner and dropped it off to a family in need.
Jesus has become an afterthought in the season that is really supposed to be all about Him. It is important to my husband and I that we bring the focus back to Jesus. We want them to have to show love, be generous, because of Jesus. Caring for their neighbor, because of Jesus.
Celebrating Jesus’s birthday is why we have Christmas. Our Beloved Savior. The most important birth that will ever take place. Emmanuel. God among us.
So, whatever your views are on Santa, or that stealthy little elf, there are ways to bring back the meaning of Christmas.
Here are some ideas:
Operation Christmas box
Adopt a child through vision trust or other similar organizations
Give to local charities
Donate toys or items to families in need
Secret Santa gift cards to families who need them
Volunteer at the soup kitchen or local food pantry
Angel tree children gifts
If you don’t have financial means, there is still so much you can do:
Pray for people
Volunteer
Visit the elderly
Make cards for nursing homes
Go caroling (social distancing of course)
And as always-Read the Bible. Read the Christmas story multiple times up until Christmas to your children.
Regardless of your views on Santa, elves, or your Christmas traditions, there is always a way to bring back your focus to Jesus.
Merry Christmas!
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