As I snuggle up next to you and say prayers, I can’t help but notice, you smell like summer. That familiar smell of sunscreen. That outdoor smell. Your cheeks are lightly sun kissed. Too young to remember the events of the day for long.  Exhausted from our day of fun.   You want snuggles before you fall asleep, pretty much every night now.  I know many say that I shouldn’t do it.  It spoils you.  But to be honest,  I enjoy those nightly snuggles as much as you do.  Maybe even more. For just a couple minutes every night I lay down next to you and you wrap your tiny little arms around me. The worries of the world disappear. You smile at me and close your eyes. The smile lingers on your face for a few seconds more.  Sometimes,  I lay there for only a few minutes.  Then, I give you one more kiss and we say good night before I leave.  But other nights, nights like tonight, I lay here and watch you as you drift off to sleep. T...

Happy International Women’s Day, no wait, it was yesterday.  Like many moms, I am a day late. Honestly, I forgot.  But the sentiment is still the same.  Sometimes being a little late, well it's just a reality that I am dealing with these days.   This “I can do it all, by myself, with heels on” culture is really hard on women.  I have fallen into that trap one too many times and the outcome hasn’t been pretty.  Though I agree shattering that glass ceiling is important, so is shattering the idea that all women have to do it all to be successful.   Frankly, we are enough just with who we are; the way God made us.  What we choose to do, or not do, doesn’t define us. So, I am proposing that we take a step back and decide from this moment forward to only lift other women up.  And if we find ourselves tempted to pull them down, kick off those heels and run the other way. One thing we need to do: normalize asking for help.  Typically, ...

  Our first Valentine’s Day together was sweet. Ten years ago now.  It seems like a lifetime ago. We had a romantic dinner and cute, little, thoughtful gifts for each other.  I still remember picking each individual gift and writing a note to go with each one.  It was all about the two of us and our new and exciting love. The next few years we started this tradition of making dinner at home together.  But it was a pretty elaborate dinner.  There were always gifts and making a pretty big deal about spending the day together.  He was busy trying to make up for all the crappy past Valentine’s Days I had with old boyfriends and I was trying to spoil him.   Things have really changed.  The past several years, I can honestly not remember what either of us has gotten from the other.  I think we haven’t done presents for some years.  We definitely didn’t this year.  Well, actually I told Jay that he got me a Starbucks coffee today...

“If they really cared about you then they would make time for you.”   I get so frustrated when I hear that phrase.  I’ve heard this so many times and frankly, it is simply not true.  I know in some cases it is, but in the case of moms with small children, it is often a huge misconception.  I do care.  I do want you as a part of my life.  I am just busy right now. I think about you often.  While standing in the grocery line.  While taking a shower.  While hanging laundry.  While driving in my car, I think about you.  I think about texting you to check-in. I have a list in my mind of things that I want to ask you. So many things I am wondering about your life.   A list of things I want to share with you about mine.  You are frequently on my mind.   But before I can reach out, almost immediately my train of thought is gone.  My kids are fighting, someone needs to pee,  the phone is ringing, someone is aski...

  Sometimes, I need a break.  Not like a Ross and Rachel, circa 1997, type break, but a break nonetheless.   A break from just...everything.  That sounds terrible, right?  Especially from a mom.  I am sure to some it sounds selfish.  But right now life seems crazy and even overwhelming at times.   Recently, I have started to truly reflect on why that is.  I have a good life.  I am so thankful for my blessings.  I adore my children.  I have a wonderful husband.  So, why am I feeling this way?  Why am I so exhausted? Why do I have a desire to disappear and go off the radar for a day or two?  And there were some obvious answers that came to mind. I’m typically overextended. I don’t get enough sleep. My diet and exercise routine has been less than stellar lately. I want to help others in need so I rarely say no.  Actually, I feel guilty saying no.  I have three energetic kids.I am basically trying...

Tightness.  Fast heart rate.  Rapid breathing.  That all too familiar feeling of anxiety.  Over the past few weeks it comes on, out of nowhere, every time I think about the fall.  Every...time. As a mom and a teacher I have a million mixed up feelings, thoughts, concerns racing through my mind.  First, I miss my students. I miss engaging with high school students.  I miss the school atmosphere.  I miss my co-workers.   I miss the smell of my building, which is quite odd because it doesn't really smell all that great.  I just miss being there.  I love my job. But part of me is afraid. Afraid to go back.  Afraid for my co-workers, my students, myself.  That part of me is growing every day.   Second, I am a mom.  My kids miss school.  They can't wait to go back.  They talk about it all the time.  At dinner the other night my almost 6 year old asked me how she will clean the toys after she plays w...

In my house we are trying very hard to eliminate the word “punishment” from our vocabulary.  There is discipline, not punishment.  The Lord disciplines his children.  And we discipline ours. I once heard a podcast and the speaker said “If your children don’t learn to be obedient to you, how will they be obedient to God?”   Obedience. People don’t like the word “obedience.”  After all, as Americans we are so focused on freedoms that we dislike the idea of being obedient.  We feel it infringes on our lives and our rights. But, obedience is required.   Following rules and laws is a form of obedience. Obedience isn't a bad word. We follow the laws.  Why?  Because there are consequences if we don't.   And in life there are consequences for our actions.  They can be positive or negative.  But there are consequences.  Recently, I broke another “rule” of parenting.   I am not supposed to let my child ...

Have you ever come across something that just stops you dead in your tracks? Out of nowhere it knocks you right on your butt.  That was me today.  I was trying to read my devotionals while making breakfast, pulling my toddler off the counter, sipping coffee, it happened to me.  Here I was distracted as usual and BAM-right here in the story of Mary and Martha, it hit me.   I...am...Martha .   Eek.  I did not see that one coming. “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” I am Martha.   I am too busy, too tired, too worried, too stressed all...the...time .  I am focusing on the million day to day tasks that need done, but neglecting one major priority: My time with God.   Lately, I have been preoccupied with planning for back to school for me and the kids.  Trying to...

10 Reasons to Embrace Your Face Mask When Working Mom Guilt is Real