As a mom we know that when we are sick the world doesn't stop. Kids still need fed, bathed, diapers changed. The list goes on and on. Illness can either draw you closer to God or pull you farther apart. Even with really good doctors, sometimes the road to a diagnosis and recovery can be a long winding road full of struggle.
The weekend before I went back to work from maternity leave I got food poisoning. It's awful, but typically it only lasts 24-48 hours. But after 48 hours I was still not recovering. Though the vomiting had stopped, I was still getting sick multiple times a day. After a week, I reached out to my doctor.
After weeks, still sick without any reprieve. Next comes the specialist who gives more tests. It is determined that I do in fact have c.diff at this point but there is something else going on as well.
But what?
At this point I had been sick for 3 months straight. Food went right through me. I was exhausted. I was weak. I was dropping weight. Luckily after 3 babies in 4 years I had extra weight to lose. My hair, skin, and nails were a disaster. I was still teaching full time. I was still a full time wife and mother. I was really starting to struggle. I was starting to feel so defeated.
Then one Sunday in church the sermon referred to this scripture:
It occurred to me that I was so busy being my own advocate that I had not given this to God. I had not allowed him to advocate for me. I was trying to use all of my own strength to handle this illness. I was relying on me and NOT Jesus.
I sat there as I reflected on that scripture and realized that Jesus was with me in this battle. I just needed to let Him win it for me, instead of trying to do it all myself. The song at the end of service was "Another in the Fire" by Hillsong United. I suddenly felt as if Jesus was standing right next to me with his hand on my shoulder, comforting me. I sobbed. I left service with a whole new outlook. I changed my focus. I took a step back and decided it was time to let Jesus lead.
I finally had a colonoscopy and it revealed possible Celiac Disease and microscopic colitis. Between the 45 days of antibiotics for c. diff and a very strict diet, I had begun controlling my symptoms. Though I didn't feel great, I was not feeling as ill. Microscopic Colitis still didn't seem to be the full story. I felt like Jesus was leading me to keep pushing for more answers.
Isaiah tells us:
And all along He was NOT letting go. God had given me an amazing doctor who was going to continue to look for answers. He listened when I told him that I had noticed my symptoms would come back if I was exposed to gluten. I would also become light-headed. My blood work showed anemia even though I ate an iron rich diet. Throughout this process of testing I would receive two false negative tests for antibodies to gluten. This is not abnormal. The third blood test did reveal Celiac Disease.
After 6 months of being ill, test after test, false negatives-I finally had a diagnosis. I was one of the lucky ones and it only took 6 months to discover my illness. However, upon learning more about the illness, I could see that I had symptoms for the majority of my life. These were always brushed off as "IBS." IBS or irritable bowl syndrome, is a SYMPTOM and not a DIAGNOSIS. But I still consider myself lucky. On average it takes 6-10 years to get an accurate Celiac diagnosis.
It has been almost a year since the night that kicked my small symptoms into full gear. My body is slowly recovering. I am still slightly anemic. My hair, skin, and nails-still a disaster. But I am starting to feel healthy again. And most importantly, this illness allowed me to grow closer to Jesus. I was able to feel his love and strength. I was able to see how he was leading me. How once I gave it to him and trusted him, that the ball started rolling and everything fell into place. He truly can work any situation for good.
If it was not for my faith, I am not sure that I would have been able to handle working, being a mom and a wife. God provided me with the strength to get out of bed each morning, when my body didn't have any energy left. He helped me to find enjoyment in my family and my career even when I was at my sickest. Most people I encountered had no idea that I was even sick. He kept me positive when I started to fall into despair. He was my life boat, my captain, my Savior.
Want more information on Celiac Disease? Check out the following websites:
Celiac Disease Fast Facts
What is Celiac Disease?
Mayo Clinic Celiac Disease symptoms
The weekend before I went back to work from maternity leave I got food poisoning. It's awful, but typically it only lasts 24-48 hours. But after 48 hours I was still not recovering. Though the vomiting had stopped, I was still getting sick multiple times a day. After a week, I reached out to my doctor.
First thought-C.diff. Nope, not c.diff.
More tests. More antibiotics. More tests. No answers.
After weeks, still sick without any reprieve. Next comes the specialist who gives more tests. It is determined that I do in fact have c.diff at this point but there is something else going on as well.
But what?
At this point I had been sick for 3 months straight. Food went right through me. I was exhausted. I was weak. I was dropping weight. Luckily after 3 babies in 4 years I had extra weight to lose. My hair, skin, and nails were a disaster. I was still teaching full time. I was still a full time wife and mother. I was really starting to struggle. I was starting to feel so defeated.
Then one Sunday in church the sermon referred to this scripture:
It occurred to me that I was so busy being my own advocate that I had not given this to God. I had not allowed him to advocate for me. I was trying to use all of my own strength to handle this illness. I was relying on me and NOT Jesus.
I sat there as I reflected on that scripture and realized that Jesus was with me in this battle. I just needed to let Him win it for me, instead of trying to do it all myself. The song at the end of service was "Another in the Fire" by Hillsong United. I suddenly felt as if Jesus was standing right next to me with his hand on my shoulder, comforting me. I sobbed. I left service with a whole new outlook. I changed my focus. I took a step back and decided it was time to let Jesus lead.
I finally had a colonoscopy and it revealed possible Celiac Disease and microscopic colitis. Between the 45 days of antibiotics for c. diff and a very strict diet, I had begun controlling my symptoms. Though I didn't feel great, I was not feeling as ill. Microscopic Colitis still didn't seem to be the full story. I felt like Jesus was leading me to keep pushing for more answers.
Isaiah tells us:
And all along He was NOT letting go. God had given me an amazing doctor who was going to continue to look for answers. He listened when I told him that I had noticed my symptoms would come back if I was exposed to gluten. I would also become light-headed. My blood work showed anemia even though I ate an iron rich diet. Throughout this process of testing I would receive two false negative tests for antibodies to gluten. This is not abnormal. The third blood test did reveal Celiac Disease.
Celiac Disease.
It has been almost a year since the night that kicked my small symptoms into full gear. My body is slowly recovering. I am still slightly anemic. My hair, skin, and nails-still a disaster. But I am starting to feel healthy again. And most importantly, this illness allowed me to grow closer to Jesus. I was able to feel his love and strength. I was able to see how he was leading me. How once I gave it to him and trusted him, that the ball started rolling and everything fell into place. He truly can work any situation for good.
If it was not for my faith, I am not sure that I would have been able to handle working, being a mom and a wife. God provided me with the strength to get out of bed each morning, when my body didn't have any energy left. He helped me to find enjoyment in my family and my career even when I was at my sickest. Most people I encountered had no idea that I was even sick. He kept me positive when I started to fall into despair. He was my life boat, my captain, my Savior.
Want more information on Celiac Disease? Check out the following websites:
Celiac Disease Fast Facts
What is Celiac Disease?
Mayo Clinic Celiac Disease symptoms
Comments
Post a Comment